Pushing past the wall

Distance runners have a phrase for a point in any race where you just don't have anything left.  Your glycogen stores are depleted, your joints and muscles ache, and you're only a breath from falling over onto the path.  Runners call this the wall.  Your body is done and you just have to will it to go forward or quit. 

Today I hit the wall at CrossFit.  The WOD was hard and it was a partner WOD meaning that someone else was depending on me to hold up my end of the work.  I was feeling that panicky sensation I get when I can't control my breathing or my heart rate and I feel really, really close to crying.  But I was feeling all of that while I carried 55 lbs on my back and did lunges.

But I made it.  I made it mostly because Nizar was waiting on me to do my work and because Jon was yelling at me.  Somewhere I dug it out the power to do as much as I could.  This work out was really hard- it wasn't like Nizar was just sitting there waiting for me, he was struggling too. 

We are capable of more than we think and it's a mental issue over anything physical.  I am stronger than I thought.  I don't know if year-ago me would recognize present-day me.  I know that I've come a long way and it's scary how much a person can progress in one year. 

So today's positivity thought it about change and finding something strong within myself, something that I saw in today's WOD but I know it's more than that.  The fact that I even looked within myself says a lot about where I am now. 

It's awesome.